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Piranha 3D (2010)

September 2, 2010

“There are thousands of them and they are pissed!”

Aspiring horror directors should take note of what the filmmakers of Piranha 3D have accomplished. Here’s a movie that, despite its surprisingly decent cast and acting that isn’t always laughable, doesn’t take itself seriously at all. A franchise like Friday The 13th has proven that a horror film doesn’t have to be Silence Of The Lambs or Halloween to become wildly popular. Unfortunately, most horror movies, especially over the past decade, have tried to travel a middle ground between camp and quality, that often results in a huge, contrived mess. Piranha has no such notions and sticks to a proven formula for enjoyable monster movies: lots of nudity, lots of blood, and innovative death scenes.

There were moments during the first hour of the movie when I was wondering when the carnage was going to start, but thankfully, the first hour is also filled with hot naked chicks and enough killing to keep us interested. The last half hour is when the fun really starts. Once it becomes known that prehistoric piranha with an appetite for human flesh have infiltrated Lake Victoria, it doesn’t take long for all hell to break loose. I won’t spoil anything, but this movie has some of the coolest death scenes I’ve EVER seen. Some of the gore is over the top (see the movie and you’ll know what I’m talking about), but it’s been a while since I’ve gone “Ooooh!” this many times in a movie.

Sure, some of the plot elements of Piranha are ridiculous at best, and there was some dialogue that made me laugh out loud for bad reasons, but I can’t imagine anyone willing to buy a ticket coming out disappointed. You have to know what you’re getting into going to see a movie like this. Piranha is a great monster movie. It’s not comparable to the classic horror flicks I mentioned earlier, but only because the greatness of those films extend beyond the genre of horror. Give me a horror movie with great deaths, porn stars getting naked (and then mutilated), and a focus on fun, and I’m never going to complain.

Grade: B+
Viewings: 1
Replay Value: I’d watch it again and maybe even buy it when it hits the bargain buckets.
Sequel Potential: Sequel was set up at the end and already announced by the studio. I’m interested, but I could see how it could go downhill fast.
Oscars?: None
Nudity: Yes! Tons! A horror flick that knows how to do it right!

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